Now that I'm a little removed from the situation, I can look back and scratch my head or roll my eyes over some of the things that my husband said to me during this whole debacle.
"I can't go cold turkey and not see her. I'm serious about her." Okay, you do realize that you're speaking to your wife here about your girlfriend. Did that sound better in your head?
"I need someone that I can have deep conversations with." Yes, I'm sure she appreciates your brain that was slowly refined by your six-year plan for college (and that academic suspension.) Do you discuss the Ottoman Empire or perhaps you just stick with psychological ways to torment your wife?
"We're in a stable relationship." Again, you do realize you're speaking to your wife about your girlfriend, right? There's nothing in this equation that equals stable.
"I'm going to give you the money you need. Trust me." Hahaha, that's a good one.
"I would never do anything to hurt our kids." That ship has already sailed unfortunately.
"She has a good job but she's got a lot of student loans." Oh, poor thing, my sympathies about the cost of higher education in this country.
"I'm not giving you back the key to the house. My name is on the mortgage too. Do you want a key to my apartment and I can put your name on the lease too?" Yes, because that's exactly what people do when they are divorcing, they rent property together.
"I don't hate you." Well, that's a relief.
WOW...wow....wowwy...wow...wow......Are you sure you are not talking to my ex? I think I had every single one of those EXACT same conversations....or have we all had a vulcan mind-meld?
ReplyDeleteA vulcan mind-meld is a possibility. Or they might have all read the same manual about how to horribly mess up the lives of their so-called loves ones while inflicting as much pain as possible.
DeleteSame here. Including:
ReplyDelete"In her defense, I told her our marriage was over."
"She's really cool."
"I am unhappy and (crying and pointing at me) I blame everything on you."
I can completely picture this - "I am unhappy and (crying and pointing at me) I blame everything on you."
ReplyDeleteThat is a classic one. 'You forced me to do everything that I did.'
It just seems very scary that we have all had the same converasation with different people, or maybe it is a star trek virus like thing that has taken up multiple bodies....in any event...i don't feel so alone now.......if I hear you caused me to have the affair one more time.........Yes because i put a gun to your head and MADE you jump into bed with those 3 no 4 no 5 no How many women have you been with?
ReplyDeleteYou might not have used a gun but you used psychological warfare to FORCE him to sleep with all those women. Yeah, okay....
DeleteBeen there...done that...infidelity turns your spouse into an alien and they all read from the same freaky handbook! Same lines but slightly different situations, so scary how similar the tangled web of their minds operate. I highly recommend www.marriagebuilders.com to anyone going through the pain and trauma (it is equivalent to a death in the family...the psychological/physical toll is astounding) of an affair. Go directly to the forums...seasoned & solid advice for all scenarios. There is also a military marriage section for you Kay. In my case my marriage was saved because I followed the plan, ended their affair and rebuilt our marriage from the ground up. It was very difficult but I am more in love with my husband now than ever (2.5 years later). Marriage Builders is also a great resource for those whose marriage is ending due to an affair...amazing support and advice. Hang in there ladies!
ReplyDelete