Vindicated by a Professional Counselor but it doesn't really matter

Last night we went to our third and final marriage counseling appt. My husband had agreed to go because his lawyer encouraged him to so he would know what he has to work on for his next relationship. What a jerk. I went because I wanted to air my feelings. The appt ended last night with the counselor basically saying that my husband should take 30 days before leaving and think about what he is doing. The counselor said that he believes my husband would be happier if he stayed with his family (if I would even allow that to happen and could get over the affair) and the counselor said that my husband really needs counseling himself. (He deployed to Afghanistan in 2010, had a father who left his family for another woman, had a bad point in his career a few years ago, the list goes on and on.)

But my husband won't go to counseling because he sees me as the problem and since he's escaping me, he's going to be just fine. So freaking ridiculous. He said in the counseling appt that he needs to move out into his own apartment to 'find himself'. How can you not know you're in the middle of a mid-life crisis when you hear yourself saying that? I keep asking myself what I'm mourning. If a man doesn't want to be part of a family, then you just need to let him go. There's no fixing that. But it's still unbearably hard. After our second counseling session, my husband asked me when he became such a horrible and worthless person while we were sitting on the couch that night. I told him not to talk about himself that way and said that he needed to go to counseling. I was giving him comfort! When I mentioned that in our session last night, my husband wouldn't admit that he said that. He said that he just remembered me telling him he needed to go to counseling and crying. That made me believe that my husband has his head so far up his own butt that it will be a blessing when this is all over.